Mulan: Lillies on the Moonlit Water
by Henry Bemis
Summary: in a time and place poisedc on the brink of destiny acan a youn girl stop the world from falling into chaos and ahnarcy?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: The Begining

Mulan was eating a bucket of orange flavored chicken. "Mom," she shouted. "I am running out of orange flavored chicken. Can I have some more?"

"Yes, dear," Mulans Father said. In the time during Mulan's adventures in china her mom died of a random panda attack in the wild bamboo after honering her ancestors with a spiritual amulet of the moon, made from amythest and crafted in the fire of an ancient volcano which erupted every twelve seconds.

"Dad wheres mom" she asked.

"Mulans father replied I don't know where she is honey." the body was never found

"Okay can I have my orange chicken now" she asked

Mulans father replied sure honey "you can have your orange chicken" and then he dumped a plate of orange chicken onto mulans lap.

"ddaaaaad you missed the bowl"

"sorry honey I was busy thinking about how pretty you looked."

"Oh dad that's okay but nows not the time there are people watchin"

"Ok Mulan that's fine"

"hey guys how are you"

they turned to talk to him.

"I was just wandering around." he said in his sexy voice.

"oh hey, how are you doing?" Mulan's dad asked him.

"I'm doing just fine. So, hows it going?" he asked.

"Just fine, she replied."

"I have a great idea," he said.

"What is it? she said.

"We should go fisit the chinise emperor," said Morshu.

"Good idea, he can them us some privcy in one of the many rooms of the Forbidden Palace," Mulan's mom said.

"Yeah, let's go!" Mulan said.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The group arrives at the Forbidden Palace. "Hey Dad, what happened to Mom?" Mulan asked again, giving Morshu a deep tissue massage.

"She was eaten by a panda bear, Mulan, and then pissed on by Jesus because she is not Chrisitan."

"Oh. Good thing since because of the war we learned the true value of christianity," the chinese dragon said recieving a soft massage from Mulan.

"GOOD MORROW SUBJECTS" it was the empror.

"Hi mr empreror" said mulans dad "we waned to know if you had any sepcial rooms availbie for my daughter and i

"oh you wanted the special room is ee said the emperor" I can give you won but i cant bkeep doing this i have to have a place to put my special doll collection and you know how much i love dolls

"oh that's fine said mulan we'll be there only an hour," said mulan.

"Ok that's fine, here's the keys to the entire palace" said mr. emperor

"alright morshu we hvae the ekys to the entire palace, lets go snoop around!"! said morshu.

"okay lets go morshu" sand mulan

and they entered the emprors palace late at night after much sex happened

and they saw

the emporer and a giant chinese dragon having sex!

"Emperor you filthy cheating hore!" said the emprerors wife

"shut up bitch go bind your feet" said emperor.

TO BE CONTINUED...


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The chinese filthy hore

"go find your beet" said emporr.

"no I wll not my feet are fine the way they are" said emprorers wife.

emperor got mad and then shot the bitch in the face with chineese dragon flame breath attack.

"GOOD MORROW FOR YOU FOREVER" said the emrpor

then the police came and take the empror away and all was good and happy. mulan returned with his father to her home.

"Dad I just thought of something who will be empreror now thta emperor has been killed by electric chare because he was not christian, he jaywalked and for murdering his wife" said mulan.

"I don't know honey where's morhsu"

"we left him at the palace! O SIT!" said Mulan. 'we have to go back or else he may put on emprros crown and become erprrors!"

"oh no morshu being empror that's worse then atheist being presedent of united states we have to stop him"

"lets go"

"okay"

"we need to turn around"

"hows everyone doing"

"oh hey shang, how are you?"

"I'm fine", shang said quickly turning to Chan po.

"oh hey Mulan said chan po."

"we have to stop them!" said Mulan.

"OKAY LETS GO said chanpo."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapta 4 ascension of the fallen

"holy crap I am king" said Morshu

"wrong you are empror said mulan" "because you put on the crown you are now empror. and we must stop you."

"crap did anyone bring a wepin" sad chanpo.

"I have sword but it melted because of erupting volcano

oh yeah I hate those things" said chanpo hey mulan did you ever meet my little friend?

"nows not the time chanpo said sshang

"oh you wanted to come too said chanpo."

"no I don't listen just listen okay come on." we have to stop emrpor said mulan's father.

"Very well, said old emprors spirit, summingin chineese fire dragon breath attack to destroy Morshu."

"hah bitchface that dragonfire makes me stronger!" suddenly morshu grew to size of mcdonalds reuglar.

"oh my god he is becoming big!"

"in more ways than one," said chan pow.

"we have to stop this!"

and the scene was set for epic battle morshu was giant and hug and faceing enemies of mulan chan po and shang. the curtains were flutternig in breeze of thousand suns as battle began to go. suddenly shang droppd swrod

"I surrender" said shang.

"No shang what are you doing?" said mulan.

"I can't defeat the enemy before us," replied Shang, a cold sweat breaking over his face. "its over" he said.

"daaamn what will we do now!"

"I have teh secret key..."

Mulan turned round.

It was...

HER MOTHER!1!1!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 ascenscion of the dead

"oh my god mom you are alive" said mulan

"yes son and you must defeat emrpror. but quick we must get away from here," said mother.

and then they were transported to the chamber of the ancients deep beneath the ground

" whoa where are we I want to suck a big hard one because I am gay" said chanpo, an entire bag of twinkies falling out of his fat mouth. (CHANPO SUCCCCCCCKS! I HATE WAT HIS VOIE ACTOR DID!)

"shut up fat tub of lard" said mulan stabbing him with sord. chanpo died and fell into burning pit of fire. suddenly burning pit of fire dried up into rock.

"now that you have cleansed party of evil spirit you can cross the lava to the real chamber of ancients

and then the crossed hte lava to real chamber of ancients.

"GOOD MARROW, ALLIES" said emrpor.

"i stil hate you" said emprrors wife

"well maybe if you made me better life you would no have gotten raped by rapists"

"that was you that sent them they said they were from monglia we stared war with huns remembeR?"

"sorry bitchface"

"guys guys stopit we need your help" said mulans mom. "we need to get ancient amulet of amythist moon so we can perform ritual to prevent emprors asscention."

"But mom we can't do that that's using idols and that's against the law of Chrsitianty"

"would you forget that dumb religion" said mom."

"Okay. if it defeats empror and protects christianity we will forget christianyt" and then they all forgot christianity except for chanpo who was dead. (SUK TWINKI DICKS IN HELL MOTHERFUCKER)

"now here is amulet"

"amulet is on moon. we threw it in volcano, and then volcano erupted and threw it up to the moon. the moon was upset so it summoned many panda bears andkilled manyt people

"that's how you died wife" said mulan to mom. "I thought it was an automobile accident" she said wiping a ter a wya from here.

"no, honey, it was a murder perpetrated by new empror morshu. this was his plan all along he told me of ancient chinese ritual that give life long life but it actually summon killer panda bears that attack anyone that eat orange chicken"

holy shitt...the group look at mulan.

"WE HAVE TO HURRY!" said mulan.


	6. Chapter 6

chapter 6 ascension into heaven

"okay how do we get to moon said mulan

"we cant just teleport there" said morshu "but you need to get on rocket."

" why can't we just teleport there" Mulan replied to shang.

"because spirit energy is depleated due to all evil panda bears running around. we have to kill one thousand panda bears or construct rocket to moon."

"well I think destroying panda bears is easier we took on whole hun army" said mulan, smiling at shang and groping him.

"no not here" said shang" there are people watching."

"oh you're no fun said mulan."

"Alright lets gooooo! said shan po, leading the way out of the temple of the old.

and then they were outside.

"in fact I have better plan. If we kill chinese panda bear leader then all the panda bears were vanish!" said Mulan.

"great idea" said mulan's dad!

"oh hi dad why weren't you in chamber of ancients"

"i was reviving chanpo with ancient amethyst of the moon."

"Alright, we have to go kill panda bears so we can get ancient amethyst of moon, which is on the moon right now."

"alright lets gooo! said" mulans dad.

meanwhile, chan po and shang snuck off as mulan, mulans dad, mulans mom, empror, emprors wife, and morshu began to kill dragons with chineese dragon breath of death

"hey chanpo want to make out" said shang.

"yeah sure why not" he said whipping it out. they rubbed their two towers together for a fuew minutes until they came.

"that was good said shang."

"you're right can I clean you up~" asked chanpo.

and then he did.

meanwhile, mulan's mom died to a panda attack and Mulans dad used ancient amythis of the moon to revive her again. only she came back with a differe3nt complextion.

"hahahahahaha, fools!" said mulans mom. "nwo that i have been risen by ancient amythis of the sun I can raise Chan Yu from the dad"! said mulans mom.

"no you can't do tha tonly jesus can resurrect!"

silence! ! said mulans mom.

then changpo turned around and saw chan yu, alive. he quickly stabbed him with sord.

"curses foiled again NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" and then mulan kicked her mom in vagina and she disappear into million sparkles.

"look! the panda's they're disappearing!"

"that means mom was secretely the panda king all along! she was on it from the BEGGINING!" said mulan. "alrigt empror. use your magic to send us to mooooooooooooooooooooon!"~

To bee continued


	7. Chapter 7

chapter 7 they don't go to the moon yet

and then they were sent to the moon by the empror.

"Wait aminute this isnt moon" said emrpor."

"you dunderhead" said emprors wife.

"quiet you bitchface go suck a cock while making a sandwich for me."

"i'll give you a sandwhich of cocks" sand shan po and shang together.

"no I've eaten enough today." said emprors wife.

"fiiiiiiiiiiiine3" said empror butting camera away "i wanted to see. oh well."

"so why isn't we in moon?" asked shang quizicalliously.

"because dear shang we can't go to moon without helmets and suits" said empror. "and we can't make helmets and suits without panda skins."

"but we killed all pandas!" said mulan.

"don't worry. I left some panda skins back in THE FORBIDDEN PALACE" said the empror.

"GASPTED" the entire crowd gasped.

"we have to infiltrate forbidden palace!" they said, standing at the entrance to forbidden palace.

"don't worry, i know secret code into entering." said empror.

"GOOD MORROW EMPERORS PALACE!" yelled empror. The doors sung open!

suddenly there where a billion archer pandas!

"noooo!" said mulan! "We got rid of panda king!"

AND NOW THERE IS NEW panda king..said Shan Po. "I!" he said, transforming into a giant panda.

"hey chanpo want to make out" said shang.

"yeah sure why not" he said whipping it out. they rubbed their two towers together for a fuew minutes until they came.

"that was good said shang."

"you're right can I clean you up~" asked chanpo.

and then he did.

lesbian sex between pandas and humans are hot~

suddenly the panda archers began to disappear!

"now's our change! we have to get in before dragon archers come!" said mulans dad, stabbing chanpo in the dick. (CHANPO YOU SUCK SO HARD THAT I HOPE YOU CHOKE ON A MILLION HORSE DICKS YOU COCK MUNCHING ASS FAGGOT! also ur fat)

very stealthily the group ran through the center of the open emperors garden. none of the dragon archers saw him.

"should I use chineese super dragon breath?" asked empror.

"no, remember what happen to Morshu?" said morshulan.

"oh rihgt your right" asked empror.

and then the dragon archers notice empror and began to fire! They were sure to die.

suddenly a man burst into the room. "My name is Moja," said the man. "And I have come to help you!"

suddenly beams of light shot out from his mouth killing all the dragon archers.

"but now I must go! there are christians in trouble!" yelled Moja. "JESUS AWAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

and then they found themselves outside the gates to the forbidden palace.

"Oh no! we took the wrong path!" said mulan's dad.

"don't worry, I know a way to get us in." said empror.

"ABRA KADABRA!" yeled emrpor.

then they were in room with panda skins... only to find Morshu!


	8. Chapter 7 point 1

chapter 7.1

(i forgot to write a line)

morshu: AND I AM ALSO AN ATHIEST!


	9. Chapter 8

chapter 8: the final battle.

"no! you cretein!" yelled mulon.

"it's time to die for you!" yelled morshu.

"no! you're an athiest you die!" yelled yao.

"no! you die!" yelled yelled.

and then the fought and they flew and they burned the whol house down. suddenly they were in a glowing battlefield of stars.

"Good morrow, wayward lambs." It was Jesus!

"BURN THEM TO HELL!" yelled Satan.

"this is it! the final battle of good and evil!" yelled chanpo.

"we have to defeat evil here now or else the darkness will take over the world and become like the hungs!" it said.

"Good morrow, Jesus!" yelled empror. then Jesus smote empror with burning sun. "you shall not say good mrorow!"

"sorry jesus said empror ascending into heaven because now he was dead."

"and the rules are simple. whichever side dies first...loses!" yelled jesus.

suddenly, Morshu grew ten times bigger and summonnned all the bad guys of everything. mewtwo, iago, chan po, satan, ghengis khan, monocole man, snidely whiplsash, dudley do right, chan po, and panda antichrist all showed up to fight for side of evil!

And every good person in world was resurrected for side of good!

and they fought and fought until everyone was dead from nuke bomb dropped by evil. only morshu and mulan was left. even jesus and satan could not withstand nuke.

"so now it ends" said mushu, advancing on mulan cock erect.

"no, not now there are people watching." Mulan said she flew back. Suddenly!

"JESUS AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!" Moja flew back into the picture. "stand back mulan! christians can't have women fighting their battles!"

and then moja and morshu fought throughout the universe rasiing every single structure they encountered.

Meanwhile, in dead land...

"hey chanpo want to make out" said shang.

"yeah sure why not" he said whipping it out. they rubbed their two towers together for a fuew minutes until they came.

"that was good said shang."

"you're right can I clean you up~" asked chanpo.

and then he did.

Meanwhile in the battle...

Moja had finally cornered Mushu. he let another beam of light hit mushu and now mushu was dying.

"care to do the honors, jesus?" Moja said.

"Fine, moja. Or should I say...Adam."

mulan gasped. Adam! from adam and eve! No my gosh!"

"yes. but first you must die. women are impure since she took forbidden fruit.

And then mulan die.

and then everyone was happy and good and Adam relived the garden of eden. he remade eve and shit happen. Now that book is called the Bible. And you should read it.

THE.

END.


End file.
